Issue 11 Contents

 

Bad Job

From MissKurtz@aol.com Mon Oct 29 08:31:25 2001
Date: Sat, 27 Oct 2001 21:08:50 EDT
From: MissKurtz@aol.com
To: whatever@whatevermagazine.com
Subject: Deli Meat and Jerks

Here's just one of my hellish job stories.

I used to work as a deli clerk at a grocery store. My two co-workers were prison guards during the day at the local maximum security prison. At nights, they worked with me at the deli. These two 300 pound women did absolutely nothing on their shift but read Ebony magazine, eat food from the hotplate and bakery, and talk on the phone to their friends. Meanwhile, I was working my ass off up front, slicing meat and sometimes chipping meat for jerk customers who wanted "2 pounds of roasted turkey sliced paper thin" for their dogs. Can you believe that? Why would the dogs care if the turkey was paper thin?

The two guards would order me around and say "Hey, Laurie, you got another customer!" I'd look back and they would both be chewing on ribs. Every night I had to clean out the hotplate and most of the food had to be thrown out. They would each eat a rack of ribs every night. I didn't get one measely rib.

Then they would kiss the supervisor's ass when she came in. Her name was Becky and she was a real bitch. The kind that smiles at you and then when you're just out of hearing distance, start talking bad about you. Oh, did I mention that Becky was friends with my two deli co-workers? Yep. They would kiss her ass saying, "Hey Becky, I like your weave. We oughta all go out for drinks, girl," and then turn around and say "That bitch is so retarded." Becky was always on my case about not sweeping and mopping up just right. She never questioned them. Never.

That job taught me to never work hard on a job. Never try to do a good job because it will get you nowhere. You won't get a raise and you won't get praise.

-Laurie Kurtz